The Mom Weekly, Volume 118: November 11, 2025
You can read this, or any other previous Mom Weeklies, by going to the home page here.
Notes:
I am writing this note early Saturday morning, before I go to the second day of a local retreat. I want to get this out before the retreat content actually begins later this morning. That’s because I want to clarify that I am not giving away any confidences or any privileged information. Often on retreats people can really share from their hearts, so I want to confirm that I would never share any of that, because I am writing this before the retreat actually begins.
The first evening, everyone got a chance to introduce themselves and talk about what they hoped to get out of the retreat. One man talked about how on this retreat we need to be like Mary (of Mary & Martha), because she “sat at the feet of Jesus” and “she said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”
Internally, I got more than a little annoyed on behalf of St. Martha. Martha was the one who had the profession of faith at the death of Lazarus! Martha, who is a saint! Martha, who had her very own feast day—July 29—until 2021, and she now has to share the feast day with her two siblings, Lazarus and Mary! (Perhaps Martha can also be the patron of siblings?)
Anyway, when the time came for me to introduce myself, I said, “I don’t mean to disagree with you, but I’m Team Martha, because she was also great, and she loved our Lord.” I was kind of proud of holding back from correcting the very sincere and nice man about who said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” I didn’t think that would be the best way to start off a retreat!
Anyway, it reminded me of my portion of a talk that Dad and I gave during a retreat for young people many years ago. I was really proud of my defense of St. Martha then, and so I’m going to include it here (edited to include only the Mary/Martha parts) and title it “Team Martha.”
Team Martha (From the Vault, 2019)
I identify strongly with one of the people in this Scripture passage, and I am going to let you consider/guess which one:
The Gospel of Luke, Chapter 10:
As they continued their journey he entered a village where a woman whose name was Martha welcomed him. She had a sister named Mary who sat beside the Lord at his feet listening to him speak.
Martha, burdened with much serving, came to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me by myself to do the serving? Tell her to help me.”
The Lord said to her in reply, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and worried about many things. There is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part and it will not be taken from her.”
…..One of my takeaways for you today is:
Love is … and love does.
In case you didn’t know, I identify almost 100 percent with Martha. And this is true in all aspects of my life, but in my spiritual life.
I prefer to DO.
Daily Mass? Check. Rosary? Check. Adoration hour weekly? Check.
Now, this can be good, because the structure of the “doing” helps me to devote time to my relationship with Jesus. But it’s not how everyone experiences their faith.
There’s a great quote from a book I’ve been reading recently in adoration. It’s called Live Today Well by Fr. Thomas Dailey, and it’s about the spirituality of St. Francis de Sales.
“With so many things calling for our attention, we often run the risk of doing more than being.”
I can fall into this trap, so I need to branch out in my spiritual life to contemplation more. But I also realize that God wants me to love him in many different ways.
Did you know that the last word on Martha was not Jesus giving her a rebuke for “doing too much?” Let’s turn to John Chapter 11, the raising of Lazarus. Recall that Lazarus had died, and Jesus was not there. It was days later when he finally went to Bethany.
And note that Martha—MARTHA!— is the one who has an amazing act of faith in Jesus and his work.
When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary sat at home.
Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if you had been here my brother would have not died. But even now I know that whatever you ask of God, God will give to you.”
Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise.” Martha said to him, “I know he will rise, in the resurrection on the last day.”
Jesus told her, “I am the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me, even if he dies, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe that?”
She said to him, “Yes, Lord, I have come to believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, the one who is coming into the world.”
I always feel vindicated when I read or hear this Scripture. And if I’m reading that passage aloud, I have trouble getting through Martha’s response to Jesus without crying. Martha was the one who went out to meet Jesus, and Mary stayed at home. Yay for all Marthas!
But Mary was also part of this, and even poor Lazarus. Everyone has his or her role to play, and everyone has a different way to love Jesus.
That is one big thing that I have learned, and I would leave with you. Whatever your vocation, whether it is to married life, or to religious life, as you live as a single person, everyone will not be like you, and that is okay.
You may be like me, a Martha, and the people closest to you may be like like a John, the beloved disciple, or a Mary, or a St. Peter, or a St. Therese, or a St. Francis.
And of course no one is exactly like one of these saints from the past. Recognizing the differences in each other, and trying to love each other in both the way we feel more comfortable, and the way the people around you receive love best, will be a gift to them, and to your relationship.
An Action Item: Consider the Christ the King Novena
The end of the liturgical year is drawing near, and that means one of Dad’s favorite feast days in the year—Christ the King, is upon us! It is November 23 this year— before Thanksgiving.
There is a novena to Christ the King that is traditional around this time of year. This year, the novena starts November 14, and runs through November 22. Here is a link to the novena on the USCCB website. Consider praying it!
(Also related: I am trying to encourage many to pray the St. John Paul II Novena for Healing for the upcoming surgery in our family. It starts today, November 11, and runs through November 19, the day before the surgery. Here is that novena in case you want to join in.)